The Post-Dubai Chronicles

We're still alive out here in this heat which is more than I can say for the three pitiful sprigs of grass in the sandbox behind our house. I think we're adjusting to life here pretty well -- no major mental breakdowns to speak of. We're still married and our kids are still alive so I think we're doing pretty well.

While the various malls out here try to encourage shopping by providing air-conditioned buildings that could give an Eskimo frostbite, (I still don't understand why it has to be 130 degrees outside and 35 degrees inside) stores try to discourage you from returning items once you have purchased them. They do this by one of two methods. One method is either not allowing any returns at all or allowing you to return items up to, oh, say, thirty minutes after their purchase. So essentially, unless you live within 15 minutes of the store, you'd better not buy those splinter-ridden bar stools or that neon pink shower curtain (not that you should be buying these items regardless of how far from the store you live). The second method is by making returns akin to something out of post-World War II East Germany. The following is a true story in which the names have been made up because I don't speak Arabic.

We find ourselves trying to return a water cooler which we discovered was broken only after we tried to set it up in our kitchen. Since our house is located more than fifteen minutes from the store and it took us five minutes to discover the broken part, we feared the worst. Fortunately, this particular store allowed refunds up to seven days after purchase. What we didn't realize, however, was that returning products was a laborious and complicated effort which only the bravest of Ali Babba's thieves should attempt. (Women shouldn't even try it at all. They should be at home practicing how to cover themselves.) We first went to the customer service desk and they sent us to the after sell servicing counter. I'm not sure what the difference is except, of course, the line at the after sell servicing counter was five times longer than the one at the customer service counter. After we showed her our valid receipt and the broken item, the woman at the after sell counter gave us a form and told us to go to the electronic department and show them the product. On the way back inside the store, we were stopped by a security guard who had to stamp our paper stating we were entering the store (I guess the large entrance sign above our heads wasn't such a dead give away). We arrived at the electronics department and were told we had to go to the aisle where we bought the item and find the guy who worked on that aisle. We found the guy and showed him the broken item and then he proceeded to write the word "broken" on our sheet of paper and sent us back to the after sell desk. Before we got there, however, we were stopped by a security guard who asked us for our papers (see - post war Germany) and stamped our paper stating we were exiting the store. We returned the so important stamped paper with the word "broken" on it to the after sell counter. She wrote a couple of things down and then sent us back to the customer service counter (where we started) where we FINALLY got our money back. Good grief. Child birth was easier and almost less painful.

Driving around is quite the adventure as well. It can be both dangerous and at the same time very freeing. Yesterday we came to an intersection where the guy in front of us in the left turn lane actually wanted to cross the four lanes of traffic and turn right, we wanted to get in the lane next to us and go straight, and the guy in the lane to our right wanted to get into our lane and turn left, and WE ALL DID WHAT WE WANTED TO DO! In a way, it is insanely dangerous to be driving around with people who don't know how to drive, but on the other hand, it's kind of nice to know that no matter what the road signs say or the traffic rules state, you can still get to where you're going at any given time. Here, the problem is that you not only have the Emirate drivers who think they own the road (well, I guess the actually do) speeding up behind to within six inches of your car and flashing their lights at you to signal to you to get out of their way, but then you also have all the drivers from third world countries where there are no such things as lanes, signals, or drivers licenses. Caught in the middle are all the expats from Europe and America who think they are exempt from the rules because they don't really "live" here. It's sure to make for some great stories if we live to tell them.

Christian is really coming into his own here. His new favorite thing to do is to make choices. No matter what we are doing, he asks us to ask him which one he wants. For example, you can't just ask him what he wants for breakfast, you have to pull two boxes of cereal out and ask him if he wants one or the other. Same thing with books, underwear, car doors, remote controls (or "motes" as he calls them). With so many things out of your control as a kid, I can definitely understand the urge to make some choices.

Henry is suffering from a cold. I can't imagine why crawling around on marble floors and stuffing everything you find on those floors into your mouth would make somebody sick, but then again, I'm not a doctor. Well, not a real one anyway.

Posted by Amy & Rich Bangerter at 8:33 PM | Permalink

Well, we've survived a whole month here in Dubai, which is more than we can say for the three sprigs of grass that currently constitute our backyard. It is pretty hot here, but as long as you don't even think about going outside you're fine.

As we are putting our house together, we've started to notice that many of the stores here sound like chains in the States. For example, instead of Pier I Imports, you have Pier Imports; instead of KFC (which is also here), there is DFC (Dubai Fried Chicken); instead of Pizza Hut (which is also here), there is also Pizza Inn; instead of Toys 'R Us, they have Homes 'R Us; instead of a Safeway grocery store, we have a Safestway grocery store. You know the store is safer than just Safeway because the chicken they sell has things like "hand-slaughtered" written on the sides of the package. Thank goodness! We'll all be able to sleep tonight!

Henry has made great strides in physical prowess this week. He is able to pull himself up onto his knees and even all the way up on his feet. He has learned how to turn pages in books so when he's not stuffing them in his mouth, he's rifling through them. As of last week, Henry has also gone on a hunger strike. He refuses to eat that nasty, tasteless, thrice-processed baby food; we can't really understand why. So feeding him has become reminiscent of that scene in King Kong, you know, the one where the gorilla is sitting on top of the Empire State building swatting at the little airplanes flying around his head. Unfortunately Henry is a pretty good shot even this early on, so most of the food either ends up on the floor or in our laps. Nevertheless, he still seems to possess unbounded energy which keeps us all on our feet. We suspect that Christian may be slipping him Oreos through the slats in his crib at night. Those two are becoming as thick as thieves.

Christian is suffering from some pink eye right now. That kid has has suffered every variant of cold know to man during the course of these last three weeks. Thank goodness he has the capacity to watch Shrek II for hours upon end. Christian's latest move toward adulthood is his insistence on answering the phone. As soon as it rings he is off like a shot. He picks it up and says, "Heddo?" then proceeds to tell whoever is on the other end everything that is going on at the house at that moment which can be bad considering we beat our kids at least six hours a day. He's told more than one person that Mommy is changing Henny's diaper, or that we are watching a hoobie (a movie), or that he is playing with his motorcycle. Speaking of playing, thank goodness our air shipment with some of the kids' toys arrived last week. We were down to fashioning toys out of camel chips. Our pioneer ancestors would have been proud.

Last week in church Rich was asked to give both the Sunday School and Elders' Quorum lessons. I'm sure the Relief Society president would have asked him to give the lesson in Relief Society as well if I hadn't said yes first. There are lots of opportunities to serve here, to say the least. Our ward here meets in a villa which has two covered parking spaces. There's no need to rush to church on Sunday morning, however, inasmuch as Rich and I are convinced that two ward members come and park their cars there on Saturday night. The ward is about 80% Philippino, and 20% British and American with an occasional Australian thrown in for good measure. We really enjoy the meetings and can definitely feel the Spirit every week. It's a good thing the Spirit can talk over Henry.

More to come in the next exciting episode. Will Amy ever tire of shopping? Will Christian's health recover? Will Henry finally eat banana-eggplant yogurt? And will Rich finally grant someone a visa? Join us next week for the answers to these and other pressing questions.

"Fear me, if you dare."
Puss 'n Boots from Shrek II

Posted by Amy & Rich Bangerter at 8:36 PM | Permalink

We finally made it to the very much talked about and anticipated beach. Even though it is only about a half a mile from our house, it has been too hot to even think about going. The beach was so clean, the sand so soft, the water so green, and at night you couldn't tell where the water ended and the sky began. It was magnificent. I was surprised at how salty the water was, but I think it gets less salty the farther out you go. The farthest Christian was willing to go was the sandbar. Even though he has been to the beach a couple of times already, he didn't quite know what to make of this. In the end he just wanted to get an orange julius and sit on the covered benches drinking it. He gets more like his grandpa every day.

We also took the kids to an indoor carnival this last week. Christian had a great time riding on the teacups, the merry-go-round, and playing in the sand area, and Henry had a good time playing in the ball pit. Rich and I had a good time snacking on, not cotton candy or caramel apples as you may expect, but little styrefoam cups of hot buttered corn. No kidding, there were little vendors everywhere ready to salt and pepper up a cup o' corn for you. We're definitely not in Kansas anymore.

Christian's language skills are improving so rapidly. He may have been a little late starting to talk, but now we can't get him to shut up. He runs around the house telling everyone what to do and putting his stuffed animals into time out, and he is even developing his own sense of humor, irony, and metaphor. For example, yesterday he was sitting at the kitchen table being noisy and then he said, "I'm being noisy like . . . a lion: rawr!" And then we were in the grocery store yesterday and I was driving him around in the grocery cart asking him the names of different vegetables and fruits and he began to call them by different names and laugh. At first it was just random, but then I asked him what the grapes were, and he said berries, and then I asked him what the berries were and he said grapes. I know that all kids go through this kind of language development, but it is just fascinating to me to watch a child's language acquisition develop on a daily basis. His new favorite literary friend is Curious George. He LOVES to read stories about George and can tell us what happened in stories we read literally days ago. We think it's because he wants to do the things that he sees George do, but knows he's not supposed to. In an effort to keep him from imitating George, we keep emphasizing how naughty George is and what WE would do to George if he were our kid. While I won't go into specifics, vats of acid and flaming hot pincers would be involved. . .

Henry will now dance for us on demand. He kneels up and bobs his body back and forth--too cute! He's dangerously mobile now, and he loves to play in the swimming pool. If you hold his belly with your hand, he will kick and splash his way all around the pool. He just seems to know what to do with his body all the time, and really enjoys learning how it works. So while Christian spends his time at the pool figuring out how the filter and jacuzzi jets function, Henry is trying to figure out how to swim. It is so amazing to see how everybody has such unique personalities even from birth.

That's it from Dubai for this week. We love you all. Please let us know how your lives are going as well.

Movie Quote of the Week:
"Yes! I killer her. I hated her so much that it .. they ... flames from the sides of my face . . . breathing ... heaving . . flames . . ."
Mrs. White from CLUE

Posted by Amy & Rich Bangerter at 8:38 PM | Permalink